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On the basis of an external and static perspective on the topological structure of collaborative innovation networks, it is extremely difficult to answer the two most important concerns, namely, which structure is ideal and how to develop it in practice. By contrast, this study transfers to internal and dynamic perspectives, and then proposes that the essence of developing the ideal network lies in choosing the best partners. Therefore, we firstly propose the basic decision-making rules for selecting partners. In order of priority: knowledge distance, knowledge complementarity and barter exchange. Secondly, a model is constructed to describe this process of selecting partners and exchanging knowledge. Thirdly, the simulation results show that a small-world network is ideal in the initial stage of collaborative innovation. However, a random network is ideal in the mature periods. This result shows that the ideal network structure is not fixed, but affected by the life cycle of collaborative innovation alliance. Furthermore, this supports the notion that a small world is spontaneously generated in the real world, and also confirms that the formation of a small-world network will be driven intrinsically by a firm’s demand for external knowledge, and not necessarily by the external driving force of social capital. Finally, these findings solve the above two most important questions.