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This paper reports on data that is part of a wider evaluation of a small‐scale project that offers support to parents, children and families affected by alcohol and substance use. Using semi‐structured interviews and a focus group, the data in this paper explore mother's sense making of their substance use and their experiences of various professional interventions which have helped or hindered their personal journeys of recovery. Mothers' narratives suggested a self‐critical inner dialogue conceptualized as shame. Fear of stigma and a sense of shame derived from historical abuse and had a profound effect on how mothers perceived themselves and how they negotiated a web of professionals involved in their lives. Community projects with a focus on understanding mothers and their needs, and not the risk they posed to their children, were considered most supportive. Interventions working within a non‐judgemental and empathetic framework that fostered the importance of relationships and connection had a greater impact on mothers' long‐term recovery goals. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]