Search

(Excerpt):'Once upon a time in Zandam, which is by the Zuider Zee, there lived a wicked man named Nicholas Snyders. He was mean and hard and cruel, and loved but one thing in the world, and that was gold. And even that not for its own sake. He loved the power gold gave him—the power to tyrannize and to oppress, the power to cause suffering at his will. They said he had no soul, but there they were wrong. All men own—or, to speak more correctly, are owned by—a soul; and the soul of Nicholas Snyders was an evil soul. He lived in the old windmill which still is standing on the quay, with only little Christina to wait upon him and keep house for him. Christina was an orphan whose parents had died in debt. Nicholas, to Christina's everlasting gratitude, had cleared their memory—it cost but a few hundred florins—in consideration that Christina should work for him without wages.”

This engaging collection of tales from the author of'Three Men in a Boat'presents the amusing and sometimes bittersweet adventures of a crew of Fleet Street journalists and their cronies, beginning with the arrival of young Tommy, a gutter-born scamp of uncertain gender. Fans of P.G. Wodehouse should find it especially appealing. (Goodreads)

(Excerpt):'They look so dull and dowdy in the spring weather, when the snow drops and the crocuses are putting on their dainty frocks of white and mauve and yellow, and the baby-buds from every branch are peeping with bright eyes out on the world, and stretching forth soft little leaves toward the coming gladness of their lives. They stand apart, so cold and hard amid the stirring hope and joy that are throbbing all around them.”

A short story by Jerome K. Jerome depicting the various small-minded inhabitants of a building and the arrival of a stranger who works to redeem them.

Another classic short story by Jerome K. Jerome, The Love of Ulrich Nebendahl is a mirthful then sobering story during the Franco-Prussian War of a non-traditional embodiment of'love.'Poetic in both scope and style. (Goodreads)

A really intriguing short story about the lives of three couples in their forties, who are given the chance to go back through time, at the age of 20, with the knowledge of the future. What would a young person do, knowing that following his instinct would most probably lead to his wretchedness? How does one differentiate between reality and dream? How frightened is one, knowingly deciding to take the same steps in life the second time as he did the first time? (Goodreads)

(Excerpt):'The most extraordinary dream I ever had was one in which I fancied that, as I was going into a theater, the cloak-room attendant stopped me in the lobby and insisted on my leaving my legs behind me. I was not surprised; indeed, my acquaintanceship with theater harpies would prevent my feeling any surprise at such a demand, even in my waking moments; but I was, I must honestly confess, considerably annoyed. It was not the payment of the cloak-room fee that I so much minded—I offered to give that to the man then and there. It was the parting with my legs that I objected to.'

Diary of a Pilgrimage is a novel by Jerome K. Jerome published in 1891. It tells of a trip undertaken by Jerome and his friend'B'to see the Oberammergau Passion Play in Germany. ( Wikipedia)

(Excerpt):'Do not blame me, Ladies, the fault lies with you. Every right-thinking man is an universal lover; how could it be otherwise? You are so diverse, yet each so charming of your kind; and a man's heart is large. You have no idea, fair Reader, how large a man's heart is: that is his trouble--sometimes yours.'

Three Men on the Bummel (also known as Three Men on Wheels) is a humorous novel by Jerome K. Jerome. It was published in 1900, eleven years after his most famous work, Three Men in a Boat (To Say Nothing of the Dog). The sequel brings back the three companions who figured in Three Men in a Boat, this time on a bicycle tour through the German Black Forest. ( Wikipedia)

(Excerpt):'“I do mean it,” declared Mrs. Korner, “I like a man to be a man.” “But you would not like Christopher—I mean Mr. Korner—to be that sort of man,” suggested her bosom friend.”'

'On the Stage - and Off: The Brief Career of a Would-be Actor'was Jerome K. Jerome's first published book. It is a lightly fictionalised memoir, rather in the style of'Three Men in a Boat', with its hapless narrator detailing his inglorious adventures in the lower reaches of the late Victorian theatrical world, amongst its seedy theatres, drunken actors and dodgy managers. It is based on Jerome's own early experiences as an aspiring thesp. The title and subtitle say it all. It's an absolutely fascinating compendium of information on the day to day life of a jobbing actor, told in Jerome's inimitably droll manner. (Goodreads)

Although not the equal of his'Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow'(1886), one can still find sublime passages here and there that demonstrate the occasional genius of a wonderful observer and humorist. The passages are worth reading the rest. (Goodreads)

(Excerpt):'As for the other class of clocks—the common or always-wrong clocks—they are harmless enough. You wind them up at the proper intervals, and once or twice a week you put them right and'regulate'them, as you call it... But you do all this, not from any selfish motives, but from a sense of duty to the clock itself. You want to feel that, whatever may happen, you have done the right thing by it, and that no blame can attach to you.'

There is plenty of humour and plenty of good sense in this volume, Mr. Jerome can make fun in a pleasant fashion of oddities...

A play in three acts. (Excerpt):'SCENE: Kitchen at Woodbarrow Farm. An ideal old farmhouse kitchen. From the smoke-blackened ceiling beams hang huge sides of bacon, strings of onions, and herbs, and poultry. Over the great fireplace are the guns, and in profusion everywhere are the homely furnishings of a prosperous farmhouse kitchen. A huge fire burns r. in old-fashioned fireplace, with settle on each side. Door l.c. at back opening on corner of farmyard. Latticed window looking out on yard to r. of door. Table r.c. piled with linen waiting to be folded. Linen press l. Door l. below press. Settle in front of press. Mrs. Rollitt at table r.c. discovered ironing. She folds up clothes as she finishes with them, and crosses and places them one by one in press.'

A Play in four acts. (Excerpt):'Time:—Afternoon. (Mrs. Elizabeth Spender sits near the fire, reading a book. She is a tall, thin woman, with passionate eyes, set in an oval face of olive complexion; the features are regular and severe; her massive dark hair is almost primly arranged. She wears a tailor-made costume, surmounted by a plain black hat. The door opens and Phoebe enters, shown in by Hake, the butler, a thin, ascetic-looking man of about thirty, with prematurely grey hair. Phoebe Mogton is of the Fluffy Ruffles type, petite, with a retroussé nose, remarkably bright eyes, and a quantity of fluffy light hair, somewhat untidily arranged. She is fashionably dressed in the fussy, flyaway style. Elizabeth looks up; the two young women shake hands.)”

Synopsis: This isn't a play or novel itself, but rather a series of short satirical essays on the conventions and cliches of theater. There are essays, for example, on the stage hero, the stage heroine, the stage villain, the stage'adventuress'(read'tramp'), the stage lawyer, etc.

(Excerpt):'When, on returning home one evening, after a pipe party at my friend Jephson's, I informed my wife that I was going to write a novel, she expressed herself as pleased with the idea. She said she had often wondered I had never thought of doing so before.'

(Excerpt):'Kindness,'argued little Mrs. Pennycoop,'costs nothing.''And, speaking generally, my dear, is valued precisely at cost price,'retorted Mr. Pennycoop, who, as an auctioneer of twenty years'experience, had enjoyed much opportunity of testing the attitude of the public towards sentiment.'I don't care what you say, George,'persisted his wife;'he may be a disagreeable, cantankerous old brute—I don't say he isn't. All the same, the man is going away, and we may never see him again.''If I thought there was any fear of our doing so,'observed Mr. Pennycoop,'I'd turn my back on the Church of England to-morrow and become a Methodist.''Don't talk like that, George,'his wife admonished him, reprovingly;'the Lord might be listening to you.'

Tea-table Talk is an imaginary conversation between the writer and a number of un-named characters at the afternoon tea table. The Woman of the World, the Old Maid, the Girton Girl, the Philosopher and the Minor Poet wax lyrical on subjects like marriage, art, society and politics. (Goodreads)

(Excerpt):'Once upon a time, I wrote a little story of a woman who was crushed to death by a python. A day or two after its publication, a friend stopped me in the street. “Charming little story of yours,” he said, “that about the woman and the snake; but it's not as funny as some of your things!” The next week, a newspaper, referring to the tale, remarked, “We have heard the incident related before with infinitely greater humour. With this—and many similar experiences—in mind, I wish distinctly to state that “John Ingerfield,” “The Woman of the Sæter,” and “Silhouettes,” are not intended to be amusing. The two other items—“Variety Patter,” and “The Lease of the Cross Keys”—I give over to the critics of the new humour to rend as they will; but “John Ingerfield,” “The Woman of the Sæter,” and “Silhouettes,” I repeat, I should be glad if they would judge from some other standpoint than that of humour, new or old.'

Jerome K. Jerome's excellent short story collection includes'Reginald Blake, Financier and Cad,''An item of Fashionable Intelligence,''Blase Billy,''The Choice of Cyril Harjohn,''The Materialisation of Charles and Mivanway,''Portrait of a Lady,''The Man Who Would Manage,''The Man Who Lived For Others,''A Man of Habit,''The Absent-minded Man,''A Charming Woman,''Whibley's Spirit,''The Man Who Went Wrong,''The Hobby Rider,''The Man Who Did Not Believe In Luck,''Dick Dunkerman's Cat,''The Minor Poet's Story,''The Degeneration of Thomas Henry,''The City of The Sea,'and'Driftwood.'(Goodreads)

(Excerpt):'The Doctor never did believe this story, but claims for it that, to a great extent, it has altered his whole outlook on life.'Of course, what actually happened—what took place under my own nose,'continued the Doctor,'I do not dispute. And then there is the case of Mrs. Marigold. That was unfortunate, I admit, and still is, especially for Marigold. But, standing by itself, it proves nothing. These fluffy, giggling women—as often as not it is a mere shell that they shed with their first youth—one never knows what is underneath. With regard to the others, the whole thing rests upon a simple scientific basis. The idea was'in the air,'as we say—a passing brain-wave. And when it had worked itself out there was an end of it. As for all this Jack-and-the-Beanstalk tomfoolery—'.”

Paul Kelver is a 1902 autobiographical novel by Jerome K. Jerome (best known for Three Men in a Boat). From the novel, a passage which seems to refer to Jerome's coming of age:'Returning home on this particular day of days, I paused upon the bridge, and watched for a while the lazy barges maneuvering their way between the piers. It was one of those hushed summer evenings when the air even of grim cities is full of whispering voices; and as, turning away from the river, I passed through the white toll-gate, I had a sense of leaving myself behind me on the bridge. So vivid was the impression, that I looked back, half expecting to see myself still leaning over the iron parapet, looking down into the sunlit water.'( Wikipedia)

(Excerpt):'I am a Republican in theory, but it grieved me that a son of mine could be drawn to such companionship. They contrived to keep it for a week--till the police found it one night, artfully hidden behind bushes. Logically, I do not see why stealing apples should be noble and stealing bicycles should be mean, but it struck me that way at the time. It was not the particular steal I had been hoping for.'

Collection of humorous stories, the framing being that they are told by a waiter named Henry. Generally good, but with the last,'The Wooing of Tom Sleight's Wife', is the best. It's a terrific tale in which a sailor, parted from the girl he'd secretly married in Maine, many years later falls in love with a barmaid in Paris -- one who happens to be exactly the same person. (Goodreads)

Fanny is a stage artist, with music and performance to her credit, and fame and name to boot, who happens to see someone she likes and he is in love with her for herself. Nevertheless he makes discreet enquiries regarding her family connections. (Goodreads)

(Excerpt):'And not only do the ghosts themselves always walk on Christmas Eve, but live people always sit and talk about them on Christmas Eve. Whenever five or six English-speaking people meet round a fire on Christmas Eve, they start telling each other ghost stories. Nothing satisfies us on Christmas Eve but to hear each other tell authentic anecdotes about spectres. It is a genial, festive season, and we love to muse upon graves, and dead bodies, and murders, and blood.'

The novel'All Roads Lead to Cavalry'offers an irreverent take on the social forces at play in England in the period leading up to and just following the outbreak of World War I. If you're interested in history but often find yourself bored by historical fiction, this funny, one-of-a-kind novel is for you. (Google)

'Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow'published in 1886, is a collection of humorous essays by Jerome K. Jerome. It was the author's second published book and it helped establish him as a leading eng humorist. While widely considered one of Jerome's better works, and in spite of using the same style as'Three Men in a Boat', it was never as popular as the latter.

The story begins by introducing George, Harris, Jerome and Montmorency, a fox terrier. The men are spending an evening in J.'s room, smoking and discussing illnesses they fancy they suffer from. They conclude they are all suffering from'overwork'and need a holiday. A stay in the country and a sea trip are both considered, then rejected after J. describes the bad experiences had by his brother-in-law and a friend on sea trips. The three decide on a boating holiday up the River Thames, from Kingston upon Thames to Oxford, during which they will camp, notwithstanding Jerome's anecdotes about previous experiences with tents and camping stoves... (Excerpt from Wikipedia)

Jerome K. Jerome, bekennender Meister des Müßiggangs, schrieb mit seiner Schilderung einer Bootsfahrt auf der Themse eines der humorvollsten Bücher des letzten Jahrhunderts.'Ich mag Arbeit sehr: sie fasziniert mich. Ich kann stundenlang dabeisitzen und zuschauen.'(J.K. Jerome - Drei Mann in einem Boot)