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Purpose: The aim of this study was to identify at what time patients with cancer and their relatives want to be informed about and receive psychosocial counselling. Methods: In a multi‐centre prospective study, both users and non‐users of psychosocial cancer counselling were asked to participate in a qualitative interview about their preferences for psychosocial counselling. A second interview was scheduled 3–6 months thereafter. Interviews were transcribed verbatim and coded according to content analysis. Results: Altogether, 61 patients and 42 relatives participated, resulting in 183 interviews (103 at t1, 80 at t2). Most often, the optimal time‐point for cancer counselling was defined by the participants according to the treatment trajectory, and the most frequently mentioned preferred time‐point was 'as early as possible': at the time of cancer diagnosis (mentioned in 22% of interviews with men and 10% of interviews with women). In particular, men also said that they wanted psychosocial counselling while waiting for test results (5%), at the point of returning to work and/or when under the threat of unemployment (3%). Women especially preferred this support during therapy (4%) and 'when one has the capacity for it' (4%), in terms of time and emotional capacity. Conclusions: Healthcare providers should inform their cancer patients and the relatives about the possibilities of professional psychosocial support early on in the disease trajectory (i.e. at the time of diagnosis) and repeatedly thereafter, especially in times of uncertainty, while ensuring the patients' capacity to process information at each time‐point is taken into consideration. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]