Ruth: Identity and Leadership from Multivocal Spaces (Reprint with Epilogue).

I was the ugly duckling, out of place no matter where I went. When I was about three, my parents made a decision that largely determined (directly and indirectly) the course of my life. They had earlier decided that they would raise their kids to speak both Korean and English. That was no easy decision considering it was Portland, Oregon, less than five years after the Immigration Act of 1965 and with practically no other Koreans in their community. They quickly reneged on their decision when I came running home one day in tears. Unaware of the difference, I had said something to my neighborhood friends in Korean, and they made fun of me. To this day, my parents regret their response, to change and raise us speaking only English, even though they made it to protect us. It did not matter that I was U.S. American by birth and Korean by heritage; American societal pressures had forced the change. I had similar experiences when later I lived in Korea. Experiences there forced me to choose between being Korean and being American. All of this held me in a marginalized space and kept me feeling that there was something wrong with me. I know something now that has given me peace. I wish I had known it earlier in life. That something can best be described as having permission to live with a multivocal identity. Ruth’s journey toward identity, as seen in the various names attributed to her, reflects this same multivocality. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]